There are a lot of good things about living in the Age of B. S., and the hype surrounding college football is one of the best. College football has always been one of my favorite things. It’s also one of the few that made the transition with me from my phase of persistent inebriation, to the one I live in now, which is relative sobriety. Unlike screaming electric guitars and sex with strangers, college football is palatable even without mass quantities of psychoactive chemicals. In truth, the hype is probably the best part.
ESPN figures prominently in my DirecTV package. I think there are close to 100 channels included with the basic option, and of those probably 10 are worth watching occasionally. Of those 10, at least three are ESPN related. I guess filling all those hours with programming is tricky, especially when there’s nothing going on sports-wise. Anyway, this morning, the lucky jokers who work at ESPN were discussing, in all seriousness, a football game that’s not taking place until sometime in October. That game, between Auburn and Florida, figures to be pivotal, or so the boys at ESPN think, for the 2006 season. Playing an imaginary version months before is sort of like a form of fantasy football.
The discussion was interesting, if for no other reason, than that it focused on the programs that are the most under-rated (Auburn) and most over-rated (Florida) in today’s game. I was mesmerized as they pontificated on the finer points of the game and its likely outcome. In reality there’s no telling if either team will even have 11 healthy players at that point in the season. Both teams have to play, among others, L.S.U., before their head to head. That the ESPNers would prattle about something that is as of yet so filled with uncertainties, and that I would listen, is indicative of the Age of Bullshit.
Like I said, bullshit ain’t all bad.